They shuffled two by two into the crowded ark.
Heads down. Hands held.
I turned and ran alone into the wilderness.
It’s currently absolute as I can’t moderate if my life depended on it. Enjoying myself better without it but if I get to the point I can take it or leave it…
I’ll probably take it.
All of it.
I have to hold myself back from winding down my window and shouting and gesturing at people. I think that’s frowned upon these days. Encouragement for the cyclists, thumbs up for the trendy outfits, applause for the parents and ‘take it all off” for the hotties.
Oh dear. When they ordered extra hot skinny cappuccinos with sweetener in takeaway cups even though they were dining in, I knew they weren’t from round here. This is a local shop, for local people; there’s nothing for you here.
The running man:
I wonder about the running man at the gym. He is there when I arrive. He is there when I leave. He is there most times when I go. He runs. He sprints. Pours sweat. Bob hairstyle akimbo. No distractions. No headphones. Head up. Eyes focused straight ahead. On what? He’s a machine. An enigma.
*important update: he has had a haircut
There was something intimate about the way he took a sip of water from her glass. It was casual. The type of thing you’d do with someone you knew-knew.
I want to be the girl with the most cake. Do you have anything gluten/dairy/sugar free?
He rode a bike. He was tall with curly hair and rode a bike. That was enough of a dangling carrot, a tall blank curly slate to project her dreams on. Kind, she decided. Passionate. Charitable certainly. A feminist no doubt and a good cook etc etc.
At the party:
She sat on a stool and smiled a slightly forced open -faced smile. She was conveying with painful effort (literally, her cheeks hurt) that she was a normal functioning person who did things like go to friends’ houses for BBQs. She expressed a disproportionate delight in other people’s jobs, relationships, children and holidays. “Oh wow! IT? Amazing!’
When celebrity couples on my vision board break-up:
Nooooo! I was rooting for you. We were all rooting for you!! How dare you?! So watch me strike a match on all my wasted time. As far as I’m concerned you’re just another picture to burn.
Love and light and run!!!! xxx Yvette
“Not local?!” Tubbs and Edward. Characters from comedy show “The League of Gentlemen”.
Hole “Doll parts”:
I want to be the girl with the most cake
I love him so much it just turns to hate
I fake it so real, I am beyond fake
And someday, you will ache like I ache
Taylor Swift “Picture to Burn”:
I hate that
Stupid old pickup truck
You never let me drive
You’re a redneck heartbreak
Who’s really bad at lying
So watch me strike a match
On all my wasted time
As far as I’m concerned you’re
Just another picture to burn
Tyra Banks yells at contestant.