“Happiness has many roots, but none more important than security”. E.R. Stettinius, Jr.
Back in the day I used to think that my idea of hell would be a stable job, secure home in the suburbs and sensible rubber boots. I wanted to be free damn it. Now…it seems almost the opposite for I’ve realised that freedom for me must be underpinned by security.
I chopped and changed casual jobs, rental houses and converse sneakers. Often chucking it in and trying something new when I felt restless and uncomfortable. I’ve now realised that instability=anxiety and a nice quiet life ain’t half bad. The years of turbulence (and the money) I could’ve saved if I’d known this earlier.
I’ve been trying casual work, thinking it meant more flexibility and freedom but getting the Job Seeker Allowance and regular work hours has been so much better for my state of mind in these uncertain times.
I really should’ve realised this earlier seeing as I get joy from routine, peace of mind from consistency and my idea of a good night is an episode of “Midsomer Murders” (perfectly predictable) from the couch in my safe cosy flat.
When I got sober, I rediscovered that much of the anxiety I was drinking to avoid was caused by the drinking and the situations it found me in (i.e.: unpredictable ones). I was rebelling against true nature by drinking and therefore punishing myself.
I then discovered the instability was always unhealthy for me so getting my own place and one of those career things was helpful too. Now I’m interested in the freedom that being financially independent would bring. For some, it may look like a whirlwind of travel, for me it may be more like a walk through the woods in my sensible rubber boots!
Love and light and routines rule! xxx Yvette
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