No shame and no blame

We waste so much time lamenting things we wish we didn’t do or say or wear or buy. This is unhelpful and floods your body with negative ninny neurones (it’s science). When I was giving up the booze, I felt attacked by my thoughts and hazy memories of shame and blame. Idiot! Why? Why me? Oh me! Oh life! Instead of going down this shame spiral which is more likely to see you crushing another cup of wine, Louise Hay suggests we think about our past selves with compassion (and imagine your child self for EXTRA perspective) as ‘simply doing the best you could with the knowledge and understanding you had at the time’.

Now I’m on my frugalista journey, I cringe when I remember the money frittered away on wine, woman and song or clothes, cofeees and self-helperY. I’m trying not to feel guilty and cross at the things I spent money on that could’ve been saved instead. Like ordering all 4 Taylor Swift Deluxe Journals individually in American dollars with separate international postage. I mean, I love them but surely there was a more economical way. Eek, “I’ll be the actress starring in your BAD DREAMS!”

In her excellent book, “Your Money or Your Life”, Vicki Robin says, “Look at how your financial life has gone so far, with no shame and no blame. Here’s the first big practical step in this program. Before we can improve our financial situation, we have to see it accurately and make peace with our past”. So, no point raking yourself over the shame and blame coals but simply make peace with the pennies dearly departed and hopefully making different choices moving forward. Moving on Swiftly like a Swiftie…

A belief is just a thought you keep thinking. Abraham Hicks says to ask yourself, “Is this belief serving me?” If not, “why keep beating the drum of what-is, if you don’t want more of “what-is!” An example they give is people who repeatedly say, “I don’t have enough money, I don’t have enough money, I don’t have enough money…” when they would like to have enough money!”  So change the record, make peace with your past by accepting it and forgiving yourself with no shame or blame. Then move on and start beating the drum of what you want. It’s a SICK beat!

Love and light and look what you made me do xxx Yvette

Louise Hay, “You were doing the best you could with the knowledge and understanding you had at the time”. https://www.louisehay.com/

Taylor Swift, Look what you made me do. “I don’t trust nobody and nobody trusts me. I’ll be the actress starring in your bad dreams” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3tmd-ClpJxA (4 minute music video).

Vicki Robin “Your money or your life” https://yourmoneyoryourlife.com/book-summary/

Abraham Hicks, “Money Drum and Lackful Thinking”, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZU1yp__zZJI (4 minute video).

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4 thoughts on “No shame and no blame

  1. Self flagellation achieves so little really… I really like the idea of asking yourself “is this belief serving me?” Thanks for sharing that again 🙂 It is as important to be kind to ourselves as to others. Journeys….

    Mx

    If only Silas had known this…..”Soy un Fantasma…” (Td-VC, D.B. 2006)

    Liked by 1 person

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