Every man I’ve dated in my foray into the online dating world seems to have ended up in a committed relationship with a special someone they met after going on a date with me. This has me thinking…am I good luck Chuck? In the quality 2007 movie “Good Luck Chuck”, all Charlie’s ex-girlfriends find true love with the men they meet after their relationship with him ends. How should I feel about this? Jealous? I mean, what she got that I don’t?  What she do that I won’t? Or should I feel flattered? It’s quite a gift and in the movie, hearing of Chuck’s reputation as a good-luck charm, women from all over line up for a quick tryst. I could offer a charge for services rendered for a date with me, ‘the one before THE ONE’.

Instead I think I feel…reassured and comforted. We all have a past which includes ex-partners, short or long term relationships and in many cases, divorce and offspring. It shows great courage and open-heartedness to get back into the arena of dating and be vulnerable with strangers. I learnt a lot about myself and humanity in general while dating, most of it positive. Like; the outcome doesn’t always need to be romance. I have made new friends who teach me things, invite me to new places, take the time to read my blog and like my social media posts. And their girlfriends seem pretty cool too. I learnt that the heart is resilient and forgiving and even after painful break-ups and drawn-out settlements, they don’t speak ill of their ex and continue to co-parent with grace. Is this what Gwyneth meant by consciously uncoupling? Maybe she was right about the vaginal steaming too!

I have also learnt that love breeds more love. You show love to the world and it reflects it back like a mirror from multiple angles like a shopping centre change room but with more flattering lighting. The dates were fun and nerve-racking and a learning curve and an act of bravery and logistics. We live in different areas. We do different jobs. We look after cats or dogs or kiddies. I’m proud of us! We left our houses to chat and drink coffee and walk and eat and watch and kept in touch afterwards because we cared about how the other one was doing. Heart-warming stuff! So take heart, act with compassion and celebrate love in all its forms.

Love and light and anyone up for a coffee? Xxx Good Luck Vettie

*Good Luck Chuck (2007 Movie): Cursed since childhood, dentist Charlie Kagan (Dane Cook) cannot find the right woman. Even worse, he learns that each of his ex-girlfriends finds true love with the man she meets after her relationship with him ends. Hearing of Charlie’s reputation as a good-luck charm, women from all over line up for a quick tryst. But when Charlie meets the woman (Jessica Alba) of his dreams, he must find a way to break the curse or risk losing her to the next man she meets.

**Jealous (song by Divinyls): What she got that I don’t? What she do that I won’t?
You must be blind! Take a good look at her. She’s not your kind. I don’t know what I’d do if I saw her with you. I’m jealous, I’m jealous, I’m jealous out of my mind.

***Conscious Uncoupling (article on Gwyneth Paltrow’s website Goop) https://goop.com/work/relationships/conscious-uncoupling-2/ 

For our purposes, conscious uncoupling is the ability to understand that every irritation and argument within a relationship was a signal to look inside ourselves and identify a negative internal object that needed healing. If we can remain conscious of this during our uncoupling, we will understand it’s how we relate to ourselves internally as we go through an experience that’s the real issue, not what’s actually happening. From this perspective, there are no bad guys, just two people, each playing teacher and student respectively.

****Vaginal steaming (from article about Goop article) https://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/beauty/gwyneth-paltrow-advises-women-to-steamclean-their-vaginas-20150130-131xsp.html)

Gwyneth’s at it again, this time raving about the benefits of steam-cleaning her vagina. Yes, you read that correctly: in a recent Goop update, Gwyneth says her lady parts need a regular “V-Steam”. Apparently it works like this:” You sit on what is essentially a mini-throne, and a combination of infrared and mugwort steam cleanses your uterus, et al. It is an energetic release – not just a steam douche – that balances female hormone levels.”